I have no words.
Actually, I had lots of them…but they’re all tucked up together now, in their dreamy little drama that I hope to share with the world one day.
I have been typing out my soul for YEARS!!!! Maybe 13+ ? I haven’t been keeping exact track but it was about that long ago I started writing in earnest with the end goal of writing a novel.
The project morphed more than once. At one point, I trashed everything I’d written (or put it to one side…I never trash precious story ideas, snippets, and the such and have a box full of them that I’ll go through one day…who are we kidding, I’ll just keep them forever because otherwise, their ghosts will haunt me.) and started over on a new thread.
And that new thread was started about 5 years ago.
And today – la fin!
Between those points – lots of life happened, a birth, three deaths and a transatlantic move for starters…and also some procrastination. Let’s be honest, I wouldn’t be who I am without procrastination.
Why, just today, at the thought of actually finishing this mammoth project – and then what??? – I got the sudden urge to mop the floor. This is the fruit of writing procrastination – some cleaning happens.
I am now firmly in the “and now, what?” phase of this writing project which will include:
- Some rejoicing
- Some fretting – I’ve sent out my word-baby to a few ‘safe’ souls for a cursory glance. If we make it out alive, there will be more editing.
- Research – I’m gonna try to find a literary agent – stay tuned for all the rejection letters I’ll post!
- Life – it will go on…
- More writing – one of the aspects of this project ‘morphing’ was that I envisioned a few books – maybe three or four? so I’ll start writing the next one…
- etc, etc…
I’ve been in a strict season of silencing my inner critic. You know, that ‘voice of reason’ that tells you to be realistic, that second-guesses, and offers unsolicited advice among other nasty habits. It’s crucial to creativity to go with the flow, travel down the winding path and follow those fancy flights. I don’t really want to come out of it.
But to move this baby on, I have to craft a marketing letter – for me and the word-baby – but that’s alright. I’ll relish that challenge. What I’m a teensy bit apprehensive about is coming out of my own head – where I’ve been living regularly to make the novel happen – and having to face the big scary world where sometimes dreams come true and sometimes…they are squashed. So there’s that.